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9 Movies We’re Absolutely Dreading This Year

The average person gets to pick and choose their films. Critics, however, don’t have that luxury. Although, given the job description, many would concur that it’s a small price to pay. Any critic worth their salt walks into the cinema with an open mind, and emerges from the darkened room with a painfully honest assessment of their experience. Candidness is key to great criticism, and the brilliant writers of days gone by have previously rushed to support this theory. If you didn’t like a film that everybody else did – admit it.

3) Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

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Much like Transformers, Pirates of the Caribbean is a franchise that simply refuses to die out.

There’s been so much swashbuckling over the past decade that it’s hard not to feel seasick whenever another trailer for another Pirates movie pops up on YouTube. In truth, one maiden voyage was more than enough, and whilst the sequels were as weak as the legs on a rum-swilling buccaneer, they weren’t really hurting anybody. The movies are inoffensive family fun and never pretend to be anything otherwise. But what’s irritating about the Pirates franchise is that it refuses to accept that it’s already had its day in the sun, and defiantly insists on staying relevant in blockbuster world.

Javier Bardem stars as Captain Jack Sparrow’s latest foe, a malevolent marauder who has a simple aim: Kill every pirate at sea. Johnny Depp reprises his role as the beloved Sparrow, whilst Orlando Bloom and Geoffrey Rush also return as Will Turner and Captain Barbosa respectively. No sign of Keira Knightley this time though, with the lead female role awarded to Kaya Scodelario.

Who knows, Dead Men Tell No Tales could prove to be the pick of the bunch of the Pirates movies, but right now we can’t help but hope the franchise will soon sail away into the sunset and never return. And if that’s the case, we wouldn’t miss it.

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