Adam Kinzinger simply cannot after Marco Rubio does his best JD Vance impression for ‘toddler boss’

On the latest installment of The Real Housewives of the White House, the nation’s top politicians are engaged in a bitter feud… again. Someone call Andy Cohen! The subjects of said feud are Marco Rubio, Adam Kinzinger, Elon Musk, and Polish foreign minister Radoslaw Sikorski.

“Huh?” you ask, “why on earth is Poland now being dragged into the Donald Trump administration’s never-ending list of niche foreign country call-outs?” Well, it’s a tale as fraught and confounding as anything detailed on Housewives, so let me bring a little clarity. 

I agree, anyone engaging in corruption should be sanctioned. But also, you got to stop pretending that Putin isn't the aggressor. Ukraine is the victim. Knock it off with the nonsense. You seem focused on only criticizing Ukraine but not Putin for some reason. pic.twitter.com/DN2XwI8IG4

— Adam Lowisz 🇺🇸🇵🇱🇪🇺🇬🇧🇺🇦 (@AdamLowisz) March 9, 2025

Secretary of State Rubio and quasi-POTUS Musk clashed with Sikorski on social media over the use of Musk’s Starlink satellite internet system in Ukraine. Starlink is a part of the billionaire’s SpaceX venture to provide high-speed internet to remote areas, and it has been used extensively by the Ukrainian military. Taking the opportunity to boastfully thump his chest, Musk bragged on X that Starlink is the “backbone of the Ukrainian army” and that “their entire front line would collapse if I turned it off.”

That’s where Sikorski came to Ukraine’s defence, reminding Musk that Poland is paying for Ukraine’s use of Starlink “at the cost of about $50 million per year.” Going a step further, Sikorski took umbrage with Musk’s mention of possibly turning off Ukraine’s access to Starlink, describing that as “threatening the victim of aggression” in the Russia-Ukraine war. Offering the final mic-drop moment, Sikorski reminded Musk that if Starlink “proves to be an unreliable provider we will be forced to look for other suppliers.”

Starlinks for Ukraine are paid for by the Polish Digitization Ministry at the cost of about $50 million per year.
The ethics of threatening the victim of aggression apart, if SpaceX proves to be an unreliable provider we will be forced to look for other suppliers. https://t.co/WaJWCklgPE

— Radosław Sikorski 🇵🇱🇪🇺 (@sikorskiradek) March 9, 2025

For a billionaire like Musk, the threat of Poland withdrawing its use of Starlink proved to be too much, and he responded in kind. “Be quiet, small man,” Musk wrote in reply to Sikorski’s post, adding that Poland “pay[s] a tiny fraction of the cost” and that “there is no substitute for Starlink.” It’s here that Rubio sought his own piece of diplomacy pie. He said the foreign minister was “just making things up,” adding that — despite Musk’s literal mention of turning off the service — “no one has made any threats about cutting Ukraine off from Starlink.”

Just making things up.
No one has made any threats about cutting Ukraine off from Starlink

And say thank you because
without Starlink Ukraine would have lost this war long ago and Russians would be on the border with Poland right now https://t.co/ImeiHFgaaw

— Marco Rubio (@marcorubio) March 9, 2025

Then, Rubio demanded gratitude from Sikorski, mustering his best impression of JD Vance during *that* fated Oval Office meeting with Volodymyr Zelenskyy. “Say thank you because without Starlink Ukraine would have lost this war long ago and Russians would be on the border with Poland right now,” Rubio wrote to Sikorski, a similar sentiment shared by Kinzinger when he reacted to the diplomatic debacle with a post of his own.

Still just blown away the our sec of state is demanding “thank yous” to feed the narcissism and thin skin of his toddler boss https://t.co/ForSoZxYFL

— Adam Kinzinger (Slava Ukraini) 🇺🇸🇺🇦🇮🇱 (@AdamKinzinger) March 11, 2025

“Still just blown away that our sec of state is demanding ‘thank yous’ to feed the narcissism and thin skin of his toddler boss,” Kinzinger wrote, adding another entry to his long list of presidential takedowns of late. While all of it is enough to comprise a three-episode arc on Housewives, the tit-for-tat was brought to an end by Poland’s Prime Minister. While he didn’t refer to anyone by name (that’s real diplomacy), Donald Tusk wrote on X that “true leadership means respect for partners and allies.”

True leadership means respect for partners and allies. Even for the smaller and weaker ones. Never arrogance. Dear friends, think about it.

— Donald Tusk (@donaldtusk) March 10, 2025

“Even for the smaller and weaker ones. Never arrogance. Dear friends, think about it.” While that might’ve closed the chapter on this particular barb-trading session, I wouldn’t rule out the possibility of a Housewives-style reunion, which Trump would probably prepare for with an additional ten layers of bronzer.