‘Why did he have beef with your car specifically?’: Massive turkey takes issue with a woman’s car and goes absolutely ham on it

Your chances of being attacked by a wild turkey are low, but never zero.

The little beasties can actually get quite aggressive, but they tend to avoid starting beef with humans. Cars, however? Not so lucky. Turkeys are actually known for their occasional violent outbursts when crossing paths with vehicles, and a lucky TikToker got front-row seats to an epic battle between one furious fowl and its four-wheeled nemesis.

It wasn’t actually TikToker Alicia Mastroianni that caught sight of the turkey assault, but she ended up in the middle of an utterly unique war zone after stumbling across a letter left on her besieged vehicle. A gracious passerby was kind enough to leave it for her after a truly strange series of events saw them lay witness to a vicious turkey attack. They informed Mastroianni that they live nearby, and as such served as an inadvertent audience member when a turkey attempted to make a meal out of her car. She even caught a recording of the attack, which Mastroianni was kind enough to include.

Ever seen the aftermath of a turkey attack? Well now you have, and I can bet you were as gobsmacked as any other viewer when you witnessed the damage our foul fowl managed to impart on the hulking metal beast. That car does not hold up well against its angry pecks and furious kicks — the damage displayed at the end of the video is truly a sight to behold.

It was also one stubborn turkey, based on the note left behind for Mastroianni. The person who caught footage — something that will undoubtedly come in handy for insurance purposes — even tried to scare the blustering bird away, but it simply “ignored” her and continued on with its attack.

This may seem like evidence of an eventual turkey uprising against the machines we rely on, but there’s actually a much simpler explanation behind the attack. Turkeys that frequent populated areas are known to attack cars from time to time, but their beef isn’t with our automobiles, but with other turkeys. That aggressive behavior stems from their own territorial nature, and they’re not attacking your car — they’re attacking their own reflection, encased in the nice shiny metal adorning your means of transportation. 

There’s no epic battle between turkeys and Elon Musk warming up — more’s the pity — but the video does serve as a flawless “example of how the truth is in fact stranger than fiction.” It could also be a stellar insurance commercial, and it gave commenters plenty to mull over. Quite a few were adamant that, were they in the same position, “Thanksgiving would be early,” but far more simply found themselves baffled by the amount of damage one turkey can do.