Just when you think Donald Trump has reached the bottom of the barrel he manages to dynamite through it and enter a whole new world of hideousness. Even in a political world numbed to Trump’s decisions, jaws were left on the floor when Matt Gaetz, Congressman for Florida, was nominated to be the next the Attorney General of the United States, with Democrats and Republicans uniting in horror to cry “…him?!”
If you’re unfamiliar with botox-addled LazyTown refugee Gaetz we envy you, but the man comes with some seriously disturbing baggage. The New York Times has noted a list of accusations ranging from sexual misconduct, right through to drug use, sharing erotic videos on the House floor, and generalized low-level corruption.
But it’s the federal investigation into sex trafficking and rape that really turns the stomach. Gaetz has faced allegations of transporting an underage girl across state lines for sex, illegally paying for sex with teenagers, all of which was combined with illicit drug use. Gaetz himself raised eyebrows during a 2021 interview with Tucker Carlson in which he denied there are photos of him with “child prostitutes” — something that wasn’t even alleged until he said it!
Despite the teetering mountains of evidence and eyewitness testimony against Gaetz he was never charged, with the Justice Department concluding that any criminal case would rely on testimony from some very questionable central witnesses.
More recently, court documents filed this September claim multiple eyewitnesses reporting that Gaetz and a 17-year-old girl attended a 2017 party at lobbyist Chris Dorworth’s house “where people engaged in sexual activities and did drugs, including cocaine, ecstasy, and cannabis.”
All of which has led to this supremely grim observation:
darkly funny that the end result of qanon was making a pedophile in charge of law enforcement
— America's Lounge Singer (@krang.bsky.social) November 14, 2024 at 2:13 AM
It’s one of the most incredible ironies of our time that QAnon — a conspiracy movement that believes a secret cabal of pedophile movers and shakers is secretly running the world — supports noted friend of Jeffrey Epstein Donald Trump. QAnon is currently cheering Gaetz’s appointment as Attorney General, a hypocrisy so mindblowing we may need a new word to define it, perhaps “hypercrisy”.
Those in the replies are also having trouble stomaching this sick double standard:
“Everything is pedophilia except for actual pedophilia, which is fine”
— Kathryn Tewson (@kathryntewson.bsky.social) November 14, 2024 at 2:19 AM
Some have tried their best to unpick this mental Gordian knot:
I think a lot of Trump voters have trained themselves to reflexively file all this stuff under "Politically Motivated Attacks by the Dems," and add some "(Who Are Just As Bad Anyway)" as needed.
— jw (@farwent.net) November 14, 2024 at 2:56 AM
And, while we’ll never be upset to see Alanis’ face in an ironic context, we fear that not even she could contain this nuclear-sized blast of irony:
— Captain Chaos (@captainchaos.bsky.social) November 14, 2024 at 2:23 AM
It remains to be seen whether Trump will get his way and if Matt Gaetz can actually become Attorney General in the face of widespread revulsion from both sides of the political aisle. But, given Trump’s crushing victory and, with the House now in Republican hands, complete control over all branches of government we expect him to be able to appoint whoever he wants to whatever role he chooses.
There’s a huge, dark, ominous cloud moving towards the United States. Life is about to get equal parts weird, depressing, infuriating, and cruel, but if that cloud does have a micron-thick silver lining it’s that these conspiracy theorists have been exposed as history’s greatest hypocrites. That’s going to be scant consolation when we’re faced with the actions of Attorney General Gaetz but, at this point, we’ll take whatever rough chuckles we can get.
Published: Nov 14, 2024 07:36 am