A Utah woman’s TikTok video about a failed first date has gone viral after she shared how a man she was supposed to go out with put in almost no effort at all. Gracie Rasmussen, known as @graciejade on TikTok, posted a video explaining how a date she had planned with a guy she met on Instagram fell apart before it even started.
According to The Mary Sue, the two connected through Instagram, exchanged numbers, and set a date for Saturday at 7 PM. On the day of the date, at 4:51 PM, the man messaged Gracie asking for her address. She gave it to him, thinking he was going to pick her up.
Right after getting her address, he asked, “What are the odds you’d meet me downtown?” and suggested they could “grab food, maybe hit the arcade, or City Creek, or something?” Gracie saw this as a red flag – he had already set a time, asked for her address, and then wanted to change the entire plan to something vague.
Lack of effort in planning a date can be a dealbreaker for many people
Gracie did not hold back in her video. “What is literally the point of asking me out on a date if you just can’t plan anything or are putting zero percent energy in?” she said. She asked him his age, and when she found out he was 26, she added, “You’re 26 years old and you don’t know how to plan a date?”
Her interest quickly faded after that. “If you’re gonna put in zero effort in, why am I going to spend my time and my energy [trying] to get to know you?” she said. She also pointed out that even when he originally “planned the date” on Instagram, he kept asking her what she wanted to do, offering no ideas of his own. Many women who have shared their worst experiences with men on dating apps say this kind of behavior is all too common.
Things got worse when he replied defensively. He wrote, “I don’t see how that’s the bare minimum lol. I’m coming from the opoosite way but I can see I dodged a bullet and coming from you, that’s a compliment. God bless.” Gracie noted that he had reached out to her first based on her Instagram, so dismissing her feelings came across as a bruised ego.
Gracie’s video got over 12,000 views. Most commenters sided with her. One person wrote, “He’s clearly only thinking of himself in that scenario, what’s easier for him, not thinking of anything revolving around you as a person!” Another said, “I agree with you 100%!!!” Not everyone agreed with Gracie, though. Some commenters felt that meeting up on a first date is reasonable today, and that she may have expected too much.
One person wrote, “Bro wanted to meet you downtown. I don’t see what the issue is. If the date goes well you go back to someone’s house. If the date goes bad, you have a 30-40min ride home with a stranger you don’t like that now knows your address. What is the problem?” For anyone curious about red flags older men display in dating, similar patterns tend to come up again and again.
Published: Mar 27, 2026 05:48 am