With every attempt to reassure the public that Kate Middleton is A-OK coming across like Woody miming with Buzz’s arm in Toy Story, many Royal-watchers are convinced that there’s something rotten in the United Kingdom.
The Princess of Wales has been MIA since Christmas, the only snaps of her are blurry paparazzi pics that have got people worrying for her health, and an official family photo was so poorly falsified that the AP has banned it. For a public figure as popular and prominent as the potential future queen of the British isles, it’s a unique occasion for Kate to be out of the limelight for so long, even if we’ve been told she’s simply recuperating from “planned abdominal surgery” that she underwent in January.
The conspiracy theories — The Katespiracy, as it’s been dubbed — have only multiplied like rabbits (or, you know, Royals). Some of the more outlandish and yet commonly discussed include a dark cover-up of her death or an impending divorce from Prince William due to an extramarital affair. One that is slightly more down-to-earth but still highly alarming? That Kate may be planning to step away from Royal duties permanently? But is there any more truth to this story than the claim she’s been abducted by aliens?
Why is Kate rumored to be pulling a Harry and Meghan and quitting Royal life?
The story goes that Kate’s disappearance is all to do with a building resentment towards the Royal lifestyle, and now that she’s been out of the spotlight for a while she’s allegedly decided that enough is enough and she no longer wishes to maintain her Royal duties as Princess of Wales. “Kate’s desperate struggle with the constant pressures of life in the royal fishbowl has clearly taken a terrible toll on her physical and mental health,” claims a supposed insider source. “She spent weeks staying out of the public eye after her operations — and it’s only strengthened her resolve to quit.”
Sounds like something we should be worried about, no? Well, hold back those tears for now, as it’s worth pointing out where these rumors started from. The original report in which this source was quoted came from The National Enquirer, an infamous American tabloid which doesn’t exactly have a 100% track record with insider Royal intel. For example, The Enquirer reported in 2019 that Kate was secretly pregnant with twins (spoilers: she wasn’t). So it would be wise to take this info with enough salt to give you sodium poisoning (no, I’m not saying Kate has sodium poisoning — oy, there goes another theory).
As it happens, Radar Online has picked up The Enquirer‘s story and run with it, adding quotes from their own alleged Royal source to up the juiciness. According to Radar’s intel, Kate has grown “disillusioned and frustrated by the ongoing drama surrounding her renegade brother-in-law, Prince Harry, and his wife, Meghan.” At the same time, however, the duo have supposedly “shown her there’s an alternative to being trapped in The Firm.”
And how’s William dealing with his wife’s bombshell move that is totally, definitely happening? As per Radar’s source, “William is beside himself over her decision. He’s stunned his wife could ever consider such a move.” Ironically, this claim will probably fuel those theorists who are certain the Mannequin of Chewbacca the Marchioness of Cholmondeley is being primed as Kate’s replacement.
Again, though, Kate Middleton nation, don’t despair just yet as the veracity of this rumor is dubious at best. Remember, the Palace has claimed Kate will be back waving at crowds and kissing babies or doing whatever it is royals do after Easter. So let’s all be a little more patient and act less like a paranoid schizophrenic patient.
