7 Games That Tried, And Failed, To Make You Cry Man-Tears

5) Assassin’s Creed III – Ziio Dies

There’s aspects of this that have the potential to move you in a way that games haven’t before. Most notably, it’s the trenchant authenticity of Ubisoft’s endless history lesson that draws you in. The near-as-dammit depiction of Native American life, from their culture to their dialect, is what raises it from the chaff.

What immediately drops it again are the constant bugs, insanely protracted fetch quests, and the generally repetitive gameplay elements. Sure, it’s sad when your mother dies at the hands of a bunch of nasty jerks, and having you play as her child yourself is a clever way of inducing that sadness.

But actually, this is a game where you play an assassin. Your job is to go around stabbing people in the neck – and before this scene occurs, you are effectively playing as your own dad, who also throws people off rooftops for a living. It somewhat dilutes the emotional impact of a parents’ death when you’ve spent this game (not to mention the ten other games in the franchise) going around killing other peoples. I’m not saying you deserved it, but… OK, maybe that’s exactly what I’m saying.