7 Games That Tried, And Failed, To Make You Cry Man-Tears

3) Beyond: Two Souls – Ellen Page Euthanizes Her Mum

Now clearly, euthanasia is a pretty sad affair. There’s not a whole lot of redeeming features about the concept, and certainly none that would cheer you up if you meditated on them. Few games have dealt with the topic, but it can make for some very moving scenes when done well, as any of the handful of people who have played the hugely underrated Darkness games can testify. When in the hands of David Cage, however? Not remotely.

All of Cage’s games under Quantic Dream are known for being nakedly manipulative, pulling every trick in the book to make you swallow whichever particular emotion he’s trying to force-feed you. And why does it consistently miss the mark? Well, because of what I just said, basically. If David Cage wants you to be sad, he will batter you over the head with generic sadness until he thinks you’ve got the message, though usually to the point where you’re numb and uncaring anyway.

It also doesn’t help that to get to those points in his games you only need to press, like, three or four buttons over the course of several hours. You spend so little time actually in control of the characters that caring about them is almost a moot point, no matter how many little humanistic touches you’re forced to endure, like making your character have a shower, or putting a hotdog in the microwave or whatever. Abominably clichéd writing (“I’ll always be with you”) and THE FACT THAT THIS GAME IS ABOUT A GHOST CALLED ‘AIDEN’ cap it off nicely.