6) Roxanne Simpson (Ghost Rider)
Sure, we’re going back a long way for this one, but just about everything in Ghost Rider was laughably bad, regardless of whether it was Nicolas Cage as Johnny Blaze or villains in the form of Peter Fonda as Mephisto and Wes Bentley as Blackheart (two great comic book bad guys who could and should have been portrayed so much better than they actually were). Eva Mendes didn’t deliver a particularly awful performance as the smoking hot Roxanne Simpson, but the love story between her and the titular supernatural hero was unbelievably clichéd.
It’s not in the least bit unfair to point out that just about every single facet of their relationship felt like they were lifted out of the handbook of “Seen It All Before Love Interests 101,” and was eventually capped off with a predictably unsatisfying and eye-rolling conclusion. It’s no wonder then that she was nowhere to be seen in the follow-up, though there wasn’t really anything in that critically panned sequel which was worth watching anyways – so Mendes arguably had a lucky escape.
5) Elektra (Daredevil)
Daredevil is still considered one of the worst comic book movies of all-time – perhaps explaining why a character with so much potential for big screen success ended up heading to Netflix rather than the big screen – but it does deserve props for lifting Elektra’s death scene almost verbatim from the comic books. That’s something that the critically acclaimed TV show actually failed to do, which disappointed many fans.
Other than that though, Daredevil’s Elektra was appalling, somehow going from a businessman’s daughter to skilled assassin after just a few weeks slicing up bags of sand with her sais. Throw in some awful scenes like the fight in the playground, and we were left with both a wasted opportunity and an incredible poorly written love interest.
But hey, at least Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner found happiness together in real life. Well, for a while, anyways.
4) Silver Fox (X-Men Origins: Wolverine)
“Do you know why the moon is so lonely?” No, me neither, but that didn’t stop Lynn Collins’ Silver Fox rattling off a laughably bad story which was supposed to be a thinly veiled reference to what was going on in this appallingly written origin story. Poor old Logan thought he’d found happiness with his schoolteacher girlfriend, but later he finds her dead at the hands (claws?) of Sabretooth.
In reality, she hadn’t been killed and was, in fact, keeping tabs on Wolverine the whole time for Weapon X. As nonsensical as all this was, it was capped off by the fact that she actually loved him all along! Snore. Her death had no effect on the audience, making the emotional wallop at the end of the movie about as weak as the rest of this watered down take on Wolverine. I mean, did you even remember her before reading this? Probably not, and while her comic book counterpart is equally forgettable, it’s hard to escape the feeling that this was a waste of her potential.
Published: Jan 29, 2017 05:33 pm