3) Steel
Don’t remember Shaq lumbering around in an ugly metal suit that looks like an unsettling fusion of medieval knight armor and a gimp costume? That’s fine. Nobody else does, either.
Thankfully, at least for his sake, NBA giant Shaquille O’Neill will largely be remembered for his ability to dunk a game ball without so much as stretching, rather than his alarmingly off-key transition into music and film. Shaq was everywhere in the 1990’s, jumping on a variety of bad scripts from Kazam to Good Burger. And in 1997, he tried to make himself a superhero away from the squeaky court with the dismal Steel.
The movie sees Shaq star as a weapons designer-turned-vigilante, and offers the kind of gratingly dumb experience you tend to get when you’re watching hotel cable TV long into the night. Filled with things that go bang and badly-timed quips that fall flat, it’s absolutely no surprise that Steel vanished into cinematic insignificance. And it isn’t coming back.
Published: Apr 26, 2015 11:50 pm