Count Orlock – Nosferatu
Dear All Vampire Movies Ever Made,
Hey, what’s up? My name is Remy and I’m a big fan of horror and do a lot of writing about the subject for this and various other websites. I just wanted to mention something really quick. How is it that NONE OF YOU have made a vampire as scary as Count Orlock from Nosferatu yet? That is the FIRST vampire movie ever, and it came out in 1922 for fuck’s sake. Yet, you give us shiny, sparkly vampires who run up trees like spider monkeys on acid. I have a crazy idea for your sub-genre of horror films. How about your try and make vampires scary again? You know, like the first vampire ever?
Side note: I know Salem’s Lot came pretty f*cking close. But to put it in perspective, that was a TV movie. Yes, a TV movie and a 1922 movie have the best vampires ever. For shame, vampire movies. For shame. Bald, sharped teeth, and pale skin was all it took.
Speaking of pale skin…..