8) Beak
Out of the five original X-Men, the winged mutant Angel always seemed the lamest. Sure, it’s always handy having access to a constant supply of quills – letters don’t write themselves you know – but most superheroes can fly AND do a million other cool things, too.
In the early 2000s, writer Grant Morrison somehow outdid himself by creating an even worse version of Angel in the form of Beak, an X-Man whose entire body was covered in feathers, giving him the impressive ability to glide… sort of, a bit.
Controlled flight was out of his reach, but on the plus side, Beak had hollow bones so he was easier to throw around than your average hero. Also, that beak really does come in handy sometimes. The guy could build a nest like nobody’s business.
As if that wasn’t enough, Beak is also not the brightest bird in the flock. When faced with the prospect of fighting Magneto, this guy decided to run into battle with a metal baseball bat, suggesting that his brain is even more hollow than his avian bones.
So why does Beak deserve a place in the upcoming Deadpool sequel? Well, aside from the fact that him and Wade could bond over their hideous faces, Beak’s stupidity and ostrich-like flying capabilities could be comedy gold.
Make it happen guys.
Published: Feb 25, 2016 01:16 pm