A True Desperado: The 10 Best Moments Of Robert Rodriguez’s Career

With Sin City: A Dame To Kill For opening today, I feel like now is a good time to look back on Robert Rodriguez's career while his name is still fresh in our minds! Alright, no. I'll be honest. This article has ulterior motives. I'm noticing a weird occurrence as of late - not that many people are all that excited about Sin City: A Dame To Kill For. I don't know, maybe it's just the crew I roll with, but Rodriguez's Sin City sequel is arriving with very little excitement, and remembering back on the original, I'm not really sure why. It's flashy, immersive, pulpy noir material that doesn't quite reinvent the genre, but it does offer a visually striking take on Frank Miller's heralded source material. Another thing I don't get is all the strange negativity I hear about Robert Rodriguez, a man who clearly makes the movies he wants to see. When you pop in Machete or Desperado, there are certain expectations, and those usually involve Rodriguez focusing heavily on ridiculously fun action. In those terms, I believe the man has delivered time and time again, and even concerning his children's movies, again - he makes the movies his children want to see. Rodriguez goes at his projects guns blazing, taking the risks other studios might shy away from. Yeah, it makes sense why he named his production company Troublemaker Studios. As a service, I've decided to recall my favorite moments from Rodriguez's career, because I think a little more credit should be thrown this man's way. These aren't necessarily certain scenes or movies specifically, although some are, but these are the 10 reasons that make me keep coming back for more Rodriguez. I know I might be in the minority here, but I'd gladly show up for a Machete Kills...Again screening - especially if it's in space. Alright, let's start the discussion and get you haters aggravated - here are the top 10 moments from Robert Rodriguez's career. 10) Ricky Gervais Is A Talking Dog (Spy Kids: All The Time In The World In 4D) Out of fairness, I had to include something on this list from Rodriguez's action-packed kiddie movies. As a father, Rodriguez wanted to be able to share experiences with his children, and since they weren't ready for movies like Desperado, the Spy Kids franchise became his gift to them. As a critic, sure, there are certain reservations about recommending such films, but as a child, what's cooler than being a pint-sized secret agent? In the same way that Rodriguez's action films are riddled with bullet holes and piles of corpses, the director approached the children's genre like an imaginative playground with limitless opportunities. While everything from robots to volcanoes are utilized throughout the Spy Kids franchise, Rodrigeuz's most genius application of fantastical whimsy came when he enlisted Ricky Gervais to voice a talking dog named Argonaut in Spy Kids: All The Time In The World In 4D. Again, am I recommending the movie? Unless you're a small child who is easily distracted by any film, the latest Spy Kids romp most likely isn't for you - but Rodriguez doesn't care. He doesn't make movies for critics, and if if he wants to have Ricky Gervais voice a robotic dog, you better believe it's going to be hilarious. I respect the hell out of Rodriguez for making movies only with his children in mind, and honoring Argonaut is my "tip of the hat" towards him. 9) Song Selection (From Dusk Till Dawn) There's a reason I have many Tito & Tarantula songs on my iPod, and that's because of From Dusk Till Dawn. You know these guys, they're the house band rocking the Titty Twister, who also turn into vampires jamming on instruments made from human body parts. They can do everything from get the room hopping (Angry Cockroaches) to score a sultry exotic dance (After Dark), and their inclusion helps to make Rodriguez's fake bar take a life of its own. Every song perfectly fits the "Chicano" vibe of the film, mixing American stylings with true Mexican settings, putting together true cowboy classics like The Blasters' Dark Night and ZZ Top's Mexican Blackbird - a testament to Rodriguez's musical knowledge. You know the filmmaker is actually a sick guitar player, right? Check out the band Chingon, which Rodriguez helped found, and you'll understand why this secret rockstar always manages to assemble some of the grooviest soundtracks around. Doesn't get better than From Dusk Till Dawn though, if you ask me. 8) Depp's Blind Shootout (Once Upon A Time In Mexico) This scene definitely plays to Rodriguez's more adventurous side, but there are so many layers to Depp's guided shootout beyond watching an eyeless man shoot his way through henchmen. His character, Agent Sands, spends most of the film searching for the best plate of Puerco Pibil so that he can assassinate the chef, establishing early on that the man is stark raving mad - but we wonder how much of a hero is left inside of him. His intentions seem jaded, but that's when things turn sour for the CIA agent, and after falling into enemy hands, his eyes are removed by some rather nasty tools. It's here where Sands becomes a fully rounded character, paying a small child to be his eyes while navigating dangerous streets filled with gun-toting lackeys. The typical, snarky Sands is nowhere to be found, as Depp starts mumbling more profound and meaningful statements - possibly knowing his demise isn't too far off. Utilizing heightened senses, he relies on his small guide as far as he can, but when a true threat presents itself, he lets the boy run to safety, and then wastes some baddies by tricking them into making noise. Mix that badassery with Depp then sneakily killing Eva Mendes, and you've got some of Rodriguez's best work - creativity, outlandishness, and a hint of emotionality. Rodriguez knows how to choreograph a fight scene, that's for damn sure, but teaming with Depp for a sightless death could be one of his most lucrative gambles. 7) "Guaranteed To Jack You Up" (The Faculty) Remember that time Robert Rodriguez directed a high school creature feature penned by Scream scribe Kevin Williamson? If you haven't seen The Faculty, stop reading this entry right now and add it to your "Watch Later" list. Seriously, it's easily Rodriguez's most underrated film to date, creating a playful horror flick around alien invaders slowly overtaking a school population Invasion Of The Body Snatchers style. The talent also runs super deep as far as casting goes, including Salma Hayek, Robert Patrick, Jon Stewart, Josh Hartnett, freakin' Usher, Elijah Wood - even The Blogfather himself, Harry Jay Knowles! "Guaranteed To Jack You Up" is a line Woods' character Casey mutters before killing the Queen Parasite (I TOLD YOU TO STOP READING IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE!), but it's also the culmination of everything Rodriguez is building throughout the film. Fooling around with stereotypes is fun in the beginning, toying with jock football players and sexy teachers (Famke Janssen, woof), but it's Casey's heroism that gave hope to hordes of fantasy nerds who never saw the limelight in high school. Woods' dynamite acting is only icing on the cake, as the now genre star really showed his love of horror back in 1998 when he took the role of Casey. The Faculty deserves so much more credit than it gets, and this moment still ranks among one of my favorites that Rodriguez has created. 6) The Guitar Case Reveal (Desperado/Once Upon A Time In Mexico) Any fans of Rodriguez's Mariachi franchise know that appearances are never as they seem, whether your talking people or objects, but nothing is more iconic than El Mariachi's guitar case that doubles as a heavy weapons arsenal. In a jokey fashion, whenever authorities go to inspect the case, all they see is El Mariachi's beaten guitar, but whenever they aren't looking, a secret compartment opens up and a pile of guns are revealed. It's the perfect touch on a hilarious western action flick focusing on a traveling musician - but Rodriguez doesn't stop there. While weaponry always stands out in Rodriguez's films, it's El Mariachi's bandmates who take things to another level. If you remember back to Desperado, the cases themselves were guns, one being a high powered rocket launcher while two more served as rapid-fire machine guns. Perfectly concealed, and incredibly deadly. Fast-forward to Once Upon A Time In Mexico, and then we meet two more of El Mariachi's helpers, one of which has a flamethrower guitar case. Again, these are the touches that make Rodriguez's movies such a memorable blast, making use of intricate details. Why use a regular flamethrower when you can turn your guitar case into one? Always with an eye on fun, Rodriguez has carved out such a distinct voice as far as action is concerned, which is one of the biggest reasons to come back for more. 5) Where It All Started (El Mariachi) When you look at El Mariachi, you don't see a movie that cost $7,000. Well, OK, you might VISUALLY see a movie that cost $7,000 to make, but it feels like so, so much more. If you've ever read Rebel Without A Crew, a legitimate must-read for any independent filmmakers, you'll learn how Rodriguez did almost everything on set, mainly because he couldn't act and film at the same time. So many corners were cut between location scouting and editing, yet based on raw talent alone, the film went on to be picked up by Columbia Pictures, spawning an "El Mariachi" franchise that includes Desperado and Once Upon A Time In Mexico. Rodriguez gets credit here because not only does he present a master-class in independent filmmaking, but he also created a fun action movie by using camouflaged water guns and local extras. You can't deny Rodriguez's skills, and they all started on a successful indie he claimed to only make as "practice." Damn, if only my level of "practice" was on par with Rodriguez's... 4) "He Never Screams" (Sin City) Maybe this pick just shows my adoration of Elijah Woods' career, but the way Rodriguez captures the death of Kevin literally haunts my dreams. Don't get me wrong, the entirety of Sin City is a trippy comic book haze rendered in black and white, but there's something about Woods' portrayal of the backwoods psychopath that hits on haunting levels of searing disconnection. Rodriguez captures this, elongating the character's fingernails while highlighting his quickness, making him one of the most memorable characters throughout this Frank Miller adaptation - Charlie Brown sweater and all. "He never screams" is uttered by Marv as he finally subdues Kevin, getting revenge for Goldie by carrying out a torturous plan full of bloodlust. Sitting there, bound to a tree, we see Kevin from the waist up, staring blankly into the camera. Marv rambles on about how even the most twisted fate wouldn't be enough for Kevin, but then it's revealed that two bloody stumps are all that's left of his legs. Kevin, still emotionless, sits silently as a dog tears at his flesh, and even when Marv cuts his head off, the same damn facial expression still rests on his face. Sure, it's killer work by Woods, but Rodriguez's vision pulls all the insanity together. Those cold, dead eyes are still the only thing I can see while laying in bed at night... 3) Salma Hayek (Multiple Films) Salma Hayek has a lot to be thankful for in her life, but she should be thanking Robert Rodriguez most of all for her introduction to American audiences. While I doubt many of you have seen the TV movie Roadracers, starring Salma alongside David Arquette, it was her role as Antonio Banderas' lover in Desperado that really started getting her recognition. From there came a stint in Four Rooms, her iconic snake-charming in From Dusk Till Dawn, and another bit part in The Faculty - and the rest is sultry history. Rodriguez saw talent in the actress beyond an obvious sex appeal, and offered Hayek some of her best roles. She fits perfectly with Banderas in Desperado, providing a fiery sidekick in the heat of battle, far beyond your typical "damsel in distress." Fast forward to From Dusk Till Dawn, and anyone with a pulse can see why I'll always remember Santanico Pandemonium whenever the name Hayek is mentioned - but her comfort level with Rodriguez also becomes evident by her willingness to collaborate. In no way am I saying Hayek wouldn't have found success without Rodriguez, but I am saying that the director made an excellent decision by choosing Salma as his muse of sorts. I mean, Santanico Pandemonium. No other words need be spoken. 2) Danny 'Effin Trejo (Take Your Pick Of Rodriguez Films) Of course, there's a more famous pairing than Rodriguez and Salma Hayek, and that's Rodriguez and his second cousin, Danny Trejo. Yes, that gruff Mexican with an even worse attitude is related to Robert Rodriguez, which makes sense when looking at how many times these two have collaborated. Trejo is the ultimate badass, still kicking ass so late in his days, but there isn't a single Rodriguez role Trejo played that isn't classic. Also, a fun note - whenever Rodriguez writes a part for Trejo, it usually involves knives. Machete, Navajas (Desperado), Razor Charlie (From Dusk Till Dawn), Uncle Machete (Spy Kids: All The Time In The World In 4D) - just a fun fact! The thing is, Rodriguez gives Trejo freedoms not many others do. While he's typically typecast as "Thug #2," "Drug Dealer #1," or himself (Muppets Most Wanted), Rodriguez was crazy enough to give the man his own action franchise - AT THE AGE OF 66. What became of it? A slew of quotable lines ("Machete don't text."), a bunch of dead border patrollers, grappling-hook-helicopter kills, intestines being used as rope, and a list of cast members far too long for this simple segment. I LOVED Machete, and I even thought Machete Kills was an ample follow up (dumb, stupid fun), but that's only because Rodriguez believed enough in Trejo. Rodriguez knows camp, goes for broke and breaks the dial off intensity wise - Machete is a testament to that. But without Trejo, I don't see the same success. 1) The Vampire Transformation (From Dusk Till Dawn) I credit Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino with my love of horror, because From Dusk Till Dawn sparked my passion, obsession - whatever you want to call it. You can feel both their influences through every scene, Tarantino's biting dialogue and Rodriguez's wild side, but when the Titty Twister locks its doors, that's when Rodriguez really takes over. Anywhere you look, something ridiculous is happening. Truckers are being ripped apart by naked vampire strippers, an ex-football star is impaling said vampires, some dude named Sex Machine has a cock gun, and as mentioned before, the band can be seen jamming on human remains. No stone is left unturned visually, and every bit of the chaotic battle is captured by Rodriguez and his team. What happens before and after showcase other memorable highs, but this outbreak of vampire horror became one of the most talked about cinematic switch-flips in history for a reason. Yup, this is where it all started for me, in a flurry of bloodshed, naked vampire strippers, and George Clooney. No sure what that says about me, but it makes perfect sense as I now favor more comedic horror fare. Don't get me wrong, From Dusk Till Dawn sinks its teeth deep into horror, but there's also an energetic giddiness about it all - and that's why it will forever be my favorite Robert Rodriguez moment. So did I miss your favorite Robert Rodriguez moment? Disagree with anything I've said? Let me know in the comments!