7 Movies You May Have Hated: Are They Worth Rewatching?

1) John Carter

Verdict: God, no, please no, never

In my younger years, I would never have even entertained the thought of quitting a movie in the middle, at least not deliberately—if it had to go back to the movie rental store or whatever archaic method of viewing movies I once made use of, and I hadn’t finished it, it was simply out of my hands. But consciously throwing up my hands and saying “Nope, I just can’t. I’m out,” was anathema. As I’ve gotten older, time feels more valuable and the fear of wasting time is often stronger than the compulsion to finish anything I’ve started.

This is all to illustrate just how big a deal it was for me to walk out of a theater screening of John Carter back in 2012. To be fair, I was visiting a new city and part of my decision to up and leave about a third of the way through was the thought that exploring the streets would be less of a waste of time.

I had been meaning to watch the entire thing at some point, and when I finally did, I felt incredibly validated. Something about this movie just doesn’t seem to work. The few who defend it seem to be defending its script, which is fine, but the movie itself comes off as an awkward mishmash of oddly timed humor and a general dissonance between tone and action. In other words, it wasn’t a failure (just) because of its marketing. I’m happy to entertain arguments of those who dig John Carter, but there’s probably nothing anyone can say to ever make me watch it again.