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Nato And Remy’s Last Stand: Friday The 13th Franchise Die-light Reel

Since we've already paid respects to one of the mightiest Gods of Slasherdom, A Nightmare On Elm Street's Freddy Krueger, Remy and I thought it fit to run down the Die-light reel for another heavyweight slasher champion - Jason Voorhees. Actually, let me rephrase that - The Voorhees family. While most of the kills Remy and I selected for our Friday The 13th Die-light reel do included the hockey mask wearing villain, Mama Voorhees does sneak a kill in of her own. Sure, Jason may not be as creative as Freddy, essentially keeping to sharp objects that can be found around a camp setting, but the deaths he causes are still bloody brutal.
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Remy: Ice Face Smash (Jason X)

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Although Jason X was one of the worst movies in the series, few can deny that it had some awesome kills. One such kill, and one of my all time favorite Jason kills, is that cold-blooded face smash. Jason puts his victim’s face into dry ice, freezes it, pulls her out, and smashes her face on the edge of the table – reducing her face meat to a big pile of what looks like chewed hamburger.

The reason I love it so much is just how well done it is. They put her face in the ice, with the camera below it, and you actually see her face freeze. That alone would be kind of cool, but then the super aggressive face smash just seals it as an awesome kill. Almost awesome enough to forgive that dreadful silver mask.

Almost.

Nato: The Sexy Skewer (Friday The 13th Part II)

When do we feel at our most vulnerable? When we’re naked. When are we usually naked? When we’re in the shower, doing the nasty, or watching Oprah – it’s inevitable. No one wants to be killed wearing their birthday suit, because even before death, there’s the embarrassment of knowing you’ll be found with all your bits hanging out. That’s why when Jason skewers Jeff and Sandra while they’re having an intimate moment, your head is immediately polluted.

Think about it – when we’re focused on our bump and grind, we aren’t really paying attention to outside surroundings. We’re fixated on our partner, some smooth tunes, the scented candles, the Channing Tatum blow up doll – the mood has to be perfect. The last thing we’re worried about is an undead killer barging in and making a human shish kabob out of you and your lover – until now. Try focusing now. There’s no awareness, no warning, you never see it coming, but hell, at least you’ll go out doing what you love?


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Image of Matt Donato
Matt Donato
A drinking critic with a movie problem. Foodie. Meatballer. Horror Enthusiast.