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Nato And Remy’s Last Stand: Man, These Characters Can Take A Beating

While horror movies are always violent and messy, some characters just get it worse. I mean, it's one thing to be gutted and killed on the spot like most genre victims, but it's another thing to suffer multiple wounds, fight your way through a majority of the film, and then be killed off anyway, as your efforts only prolonged your suffering. Nice try and all, but was it really worth getting all your limbs broken, an eye ripped out, and THEN your throat cut open? Gosh, if I ever have to die in a slasher movie, just make it quick and get it over with.

Remy – Jessica Alba in The Killer Inside Me

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First off, I need to preface my picks with the genuine thought that seeing woman get hurt pretty much makes the soul ache, no matter who you are. But we all also need to understand, that is exactly why horror movies USE females as heroes and victims. It gets an emotional reaction from us we just don’t feel when a 300 pound man is brutalized.

While this may hint at some greater sexism issues, I just wanted to get that out of the way before I start talking about The Killer Inside Me, which is filled with some of the most unsettling and realistic violence I have ever seen on film – and no moment captures that violence quite like Casey Affeck’s BRUTAL beatdown of Jessica Alba. My first thoughts were: I didn’t know she made movies like this (S&M and brutal violence), and my second thought was: When is he going to stop punching her face into raw hamburger meat. That scene pretty much made me ill. And imagine my surprise (SPOILER ALERT) when she appears later on in the movie. Ah, sociopaths in love. Story of my life.

Nato – Eric in Evil Dead (2013)

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When thinking of beaten, battered, and bruised characters, the first character that comes to mind is Eric in Fede Alvarez’s Evil Dead remake. Is that because it’s still fresh in my mind? Possibly. Is it also because this human pincushion should have bled out 24 times over before he actually does? Absolutely.

Let’s follow Eric’s punishing journey, shall we? First he slams his back against the toilet while backing away from Olivia, who then stabs him directly in the chest with a piece of broken mirror, followed by her syringe stabs that narrowly miss his eye. Enough to put anyone down, right? Well, not Eric! Up next is a possessed Natalie, who lands numerous shots on Eric with her nail gun, one of which pins his hand to his chest. But if that wasn’t enough, she then attacks with a crowbar, disfiguring his hand which he uses in an attempt to protect his body, but the wasted attempt doesn’t stop Natalie from getting some solid shots to the dome. Eric has to be done, right? WRONG! Guess who saves the day when Mia attempts to drown her brother David – ERIC! Subduing Mia with a sedative, Eric finally takes one final wound in the way of a boxcutter to the body, and he finally goes out in peace.

Then of course the prick bastard stabs David in the neck as a Deadite, fulfilling the prophecy as David kills both Eric and himself by shooting a gasoline container with his shotgun. So yeah, technically Eric is burned alive as well, after being dead, so technically he was burned, undead? Either way, Lou Taylor Pucci’s character acted like a freakin’ Tank from Left 4 Dead in Alvarez’s remake, laughing numerous times in Death’s face.