Nato And Remy’s Last Stand: Horror Hotties We Watch Terrible Movies To See

Nato: Sara Paxton (Shark Night 3D)

I would never recommend Shark Night 3D even on my worst enemy (apologies to the late David R. Ellis), but if you absolutely love torturing yourself with weak PG-13 horror rip-offs, at least the stammeringly sweet and pouty Sara Paxton is there to get you through the bloodless, scareless, guppy of a film.

Sara Paxton isn’t someone I ogle like the Night of the Demon girls though, no, I’m more infatuated with her than pervy. She’s the kind of girl I’d take out for a fancy dinner and spend the next two days struggling not to call back and pour my guts out too. The kind of girl I just want to watch a movie and cuddle with. I mean, like, cuddle the shit out of. I’d cuddle her for days. Hot, sweaty, primal-instinct type cuddling. Oh man, we could cuddle in so many different positions, so many ways…like a tantric cuddle-fest of epic proportions.

Uh oh, I think I just “chummed the waters.” (That joke was for you, shark enthusiasts.)