'You will own nothing and be happy': The new MAGA motto is that being poor is actually kinda awesome – We Got This Covered
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The crowd stands for the Pledge of Allegiance during a rally hosted by former President Donald Trump at the Delaware County Fairgrounds on April 23, 2022 in Delaware, Ohio. Last week, Trump announced his endorsement of J.D. Vance in the Ohio Republican Senate primary. (Photo by Drew Angerer/Getty Images) / Diogenes, 1860. The Greek philosopher Diogenes (404-323 BC) is seated in his abode, the earthenware tub, in the Metroon, Athens, lighting the lamp in daylight with which he was to search for an honest man. His companions were dogs that also served as emblems of his "Cynic" (Greek: "kynikos," dog-like) philosophy, which emphasized an austere existence. Three years after this painting was first exhibited, Gerome was appointed a professor of painting at the Ecole des Beaux-Arts where he would instruct many students, both French and foreign. Creator: Jean-Leon Gerome. (Photo by Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)
Images by Drew Angerer/Getty Images / Heritage Art/Heritage Images

‘You will own nothing and be happy’: The new MAGA motto is that being poor is actually kinda awesome

Free yourself from the shackles of material possessions!

Got your eye on a shiny new Nintendo Switch 2? Think you could use a new TV in the next few years? Planning to get a new car to replace your old banger? Well, think again, because MAGA has decided that the whole buying consumer products thing is lame, boring, and you’re an idiot (possibly also a homosexual) for wanting to own stuff.

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Yup, faced with the now-undeniable fact that Captain Trump is steering the ocean liner United States straight into the biggest iceberg you ever saw, his MAGA cheerleaders have seamlessly pivoted from arguing he’s going to rescue the economy and usher in a new golden age, to arguing that only a fool finds happiness in material goods.

Over on The Quartering, the message couldn’t have been clearer: “You do NOT need the new video game console. You WANT them”. Only time will tell how well this goes down with the highly strung freaks that make up his fanbase, who we’re sure will be happy sticking with their creaky old Nintendo Switch 1s for years to come:

This pivot to being, as @JJ_McCullough puts it, to being “opposed to affordable consumer goods” is certainly a vibe! We’ll just have to see whether it translates to popularity with voters!

In many ways, this change of course toward arguing that we should free ourselves from the shackles of material possessions is refreshing. After all, ancient Greek philosopher Diogenes began life in a wealthy family, but ended up happily living in a jar in the middle of Athens after concluding that materialism was a false truth.

MAGA may even be approaching one of the core tenets of the Buddha’s philosophy of non-attachment: letting go of any desire for material possessions as a key part of the path to enlightenment, thus taking their first shaky steps along a path that’ll lead them to inner peace, wisdom and an all-encompassing compassion towards every living thing.

Alternatively, the moment they face any real adversity as a result of Trump’s economic collapse they may wail like a baby whose rattle has been taken away. Either way, with the wrecking ball that is Donald Trump trashing large parts of the world economy, we’ll get the exciting answer very soon!


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David James
I'm a writer/editor who's been at the site since 2015. Love writing about video games and will crawl over broken glass to write about anything related to Hideo Kojima. But am happy to write about anything and everything, so long as it's interesting!