The re-emergence of Ke Huy Quan has been among the most wonderful things to witness in Hollywood in recent years, so there’s genuine enthusiasm that comes with watching him take on his first ever leading role. That opportunity emerged with Love Hurts, a Valentine’s Day-themed action comedy film that also constitutes another man’s first: debuting director Jonathan Eusebio, who’s best known for his work as a stunt coordinator in movies like Fall Guy, Black Panther and John Wick.
Love Hurts is a fun time at the theater, but it’s unfortunately a half-baked fun time at the theater — unlike the perfectly confected heart-shaped Valentine’s Day cookies Quan’s real estate agent protagonist Marvin Gable makes for his colleagues and clients in the opening sequence of the film. Marvin is introduced to us as a glass half-full type of guy with a genuine appetite for life. He cooks soup, rides a bike to work (making occasional pit stops to clean up litter), delivers pep talks to his depressed employee Ashley (Lio Tipton), and goes the extra mile to sell his houses.

It’s incredibly easy to bite into the actor in this role — it’s more or less the kind-bordering-on-innocent archetype that earned him an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor in Everything Everywhere All At Once. Also similar to his role in that film is Marvin’s secret identity as a former assassin working for his brother’s organized crime group referred to only as The Company, resulting in the same “everyday man turned action star” twist. Quan once again puts his background as a stunts choreographer and martial arts black belt to good use, completely transforming for the film’s many fight sequences.
Unfortunately, where Love Hurts cannot match Everything Everywhere is in the latter’s ability to juggle different tones and beats, never losing its emotional punch in the midst of all the action, comedy, and absurdity. Eusebio’s film attempts to do a bit of the same balancing act, primarily by introducing a romantic storyline as the driving force of the plot.
As it turns out, Marvin’s brother Alvin “Knuckles” Gable (Daniel Wu) is hunting him after learning that the woman he was supposed to have killed, his deceitful former right-hand Rose (fellow Oscar winner Ariana DeBose) is alive and well and looking for revenge. We soon learn that Marvin only spared her because he was in love with her, though we are never shown what it is that he loves about her exactly. The story does, however, depend heavily on the audience rooting for the duo, but it’s tough to do so when there’s nothing to hold on to or, sadly, no real chemistry between the leads.

In its short and sweet 83-minute runtime, Love Hurts tries to fit two love stories, a traumatic brotherly relationship with abusive overtones, a collection of funny-ish side characters with their own personal dilemmas, a Goonies reunion, and a powerful personal journey for its lead. It only truly succeeds with those last two.
Playing Marvin’s boss Cliff is Sean Astin, who played the Mikey to Quan’s Data in Richard Donner’s beloved 1985 classic when the actors were just tweens. Astin steals the show during his very short time on screen, and the two deliver one of the film’s best accomplished moments, when Cliff gives Marvin a plaque for Regional Realtor of the Year. This scene is directly tied to that last aspect — the plaque brings Marvin to tears in a moment that feels remarkably grounded thanks to the two actors’ easy charm and candor. Succeeding at his mundane job is monumental for Marvin as a representation that he’s successfully moved past his violent past under the strict rule of his vicious brother.
The achievement doesn’t last long, though, because Rose’s return has literally unearthed everything he had tried to bury, proving that, until he faces his brother head-on, that past will always come back to haunt him. “Hiding ain’t living” basically turns into her catchphrase, and it is meant to function as the film’s too. Disappointingly, its underdeveloped script smothered by one too many fight sequences (as well choreographed and blocked as they may be), characters, and clichéd zingers keeps it from achieving the sincerity it seems to be desperately striving for.

Still, I meant it when I said the film is a lot of fun.
There are nods to the Eastern Asian culture shared by Eusebio, Quan, and Wu — namely some of the kung fu movies displayed in Knuckles’ dated video store that he uses as a front for his shady dealings, and the emphasis given to bubble tea which we’ll keep unspoiled for the sake of preserving the experience.
That aforementioned cast of sidekicks includes Marshawn Lynch, who was clearly meant to ditch the football field for Hollywood film studios because he’s just as funny here as he was in 2023’s Bottoms. One of the most compelling complimentary arcs, whose consistency Love Hurts deserves props for, is shared between his character King and his partner in crime Otis. The latter’s wife thinks he’s emotionally constipated, and it’s King who advises him on how to win her back in stand-alone scenes and dialogues scattered throughout the film that are genuinely endearing and well acted.

Then there’s Luke Cage‘s Mustafa Shakir as Raven — a poet trapped inside the body of a ruthless killer (there’s a Taylor Swift song like that that he’d appreciate, by the way). Superhero enthusiasts will get a kick out of the way he customizes his entire wardrobe, weapons of choice, and fighting mode around the ominous black bird identity. He’s at the center of the supplementary love story with Tipton’s Ashley, though it somehow manages to be even more awkward than the principal affair.
Ariana DeBose is also apt in her first active action role, making the most of a thin screenplay with little insight into her character and pulling her own weight in the more physical scenes. It’s also evident how much fun costume designer Patricia J. Henderson had with DeBose’s character, though Knuckles’ suits and a particularly adorable sweater that Rose gifts Marvin are additional highlights.
Love Hurts is not a waste of your money by any means, but I can also think of a dozen other films in theaters right now that would be a better investment. It’s great if you’re more of a no-strings-attached kind of person on Valentine’s Day, but if you’re looking to fall madly in love, better to try something else. Nonetheless, Ke Huy Quan is always a peach.
Published: Feb 8, 2025 11:26 am