8 Really Dumb Things About The Arrowverse That We Can’t Ignore

Every year, we tell ourselves that we'll quit watching Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl and Legends of Tomorrow. But no matter what promises and ultimatums we make, we end up soaking up the Arrowverse like sponges. It's become shameless, really. We could sit here and tell you how these shows have become better over time and that's why we persist, but that would be a big, fat lie. In fact, there are some really dumb things about this universe, and we think it's time to talk about it frankly. Naturally, these shows have all been renewed for another season, so it proves there are people out there who disagree with us (or are suckers for punishment like we are). But as always, we encourage you to let us know your candid thoughts in the comments section. After all, this is a safe place, so feel free to rage about it if you so choose to. Fair warning, though: Starting on the next page, we'll be diving deep into the realm of dumb, so prepare yourself for the head-shaking nonsense. The Annoying Intros "My name is Barry Allen, and I'm the fastest man alive." No sh*t, Sherlock. The chances are if we're tuned in, it's because we actually want to watch the damn show and know what it's about already. While this narrated intro was a nice, stylized touch for the first season, it's become overkill by now and annoys more than it entertains. The problem with this monologue is that it only adds fuel to the fire that the Arrowverse is extremely formulaic. At the end of every season, the showrunners promise that the following one will be entirely different and fresh, but it ends up being more of the same and disappointing us beyond measure. Considering a show's intro is our first touch point to the series, you'd think this is the most obvious thing to change. We're not against recaps of the previous episodes or seasons, but these generic intros need to grow some legs and go play in traffic now. Honestly, ask yourself: how many times have you sighed even before the show starts just because of Barry or Oliver's voice? The Tiresome Love Stories Holy mother of dragons, but the Arrowverse has more love drama than Gossip Girl and Riverdale combined. Sure, we know it's The CW and the network adores its soapie-inspired storylines, but can someone please remind the writers that this is supposed to be about superheroes, first and foremost? It's like everybody in the universe has to have a significant other or pine over someone who's unattainable. Is this even real life? Because there's not one single character that turns around and says, "Nah, it's cool, fam. I don't need no S.O. drama, so I'll just chill on my couch and play PlayStation." Instead, they're constantly trying to hook up with each other and cry about it when it ends badly. Like a bunch of horny teenagers. Rather than seeing Oliver square off with Slade Wilson, for example, we're subjected to seeing him mope around and waste time with Felicity Smoak as they try to rekindle their on-off relationship. Yes, romance is important, but for the love of Jack Kirby, please tone it down a notch for all of us. Death Means Nothing Remember how Stefano DiMera was labeled as the Phoenix in Days of Our Lives because he'd always rise from the dead? Well, he's got nothing on the Arrowverse's population. We've seen more people brought to life, die, and then be brought back to life again than anywhere else. If that's not enough, there are different versions of the characters living on multiple Earths to make sure these actors are never without a paycheck. While that's all fine and dandy for them, it cheapens the impact of any character's death since we know it won't be permanent. Effectively, all these teasers and promises of major deaths are redundant and mean nothing in this universe. The reason that people are genuinely shocked and surprised by the likes of Game of Thrones and The Walking Dead is because the shows commit to their plans. You don't see Glenn coming back and saying, "Psych, guys. I'm not really dead, lol." It's a conclusion and there's no coming back from it. If character deaths are only used as placeholders for when you need a cliffhanger to get the audience to come back the next week, then they're pretty pointless and extremely ineffective. Secret Identities Aren't So Secret You know how superheroes try to keep their true identities secret to protect their families and themselves from their enemies? Yeah, the guys and girls in the Arrowverse are incredibly bad at that and blubber about who they really are to anyone willing to listen. We don't even know how many people know that Oliver Queen is the Green Arrow at this point. Every passing season, a handful of people figure out our heroes' identities; thereby, making their secrets irrelevant. Also, considering it's 2017, do you really think someone wouldn't tweet or post something on social media if they knew the Black Canary's real name? Yet, these idiots continue to make their circles of trust even bigger… A lot of people gave Tony Stark stick for revealing that he was Iron Man to the world, but at least he isn't pretending that he's good at keeping it a secret. Heck, knowing our Arrowverse heroes, we wouldn't even trust them to keep it quiet if we were playing hooky for a day or two. It Wastes Its Best Characters Now, we're not talking about the titular heroes, but the supporting cast. Too often a character is brought in, does something exceptionally well, and then is pulled from the series abruptly. To recall a recent example: raise your hand if you'd preferred it if Grodd or King Shark had been the big bad of season 3 of The Flash instead of Savitar. Rather than focus on characters that are interesting and have stories to tell, the showrunners turn back to the boring and bland ones, e.g. Damien Darhk and Thea Queen. It's frustrating to see the same old people doing the same old things on the series, when there's a plethora of other characters waiting in the wings for their opportunity to shine. Look, we understand that there are some heroes and villains tied up in legalities because of the DCEU and all those agreements, but that's simply no excuse for misusing the ones at your disposal. Do we really need to recycle the same storylines and characters over and over again? Batman Exists… But No One Calls Him We all know by now that Batman exists in the Arrowverse and has been referenced on more than one occasion. He looms in the background, like a silent protector and champion of justice. So, um, why has no one called upon him when they've needed him? From a rights perspective, there's obviously a lot of red tape to get through in order to utilize the character here; however, we've yet to see a substantial tribute or some off-screen assistance from Brucey boy. Seriously, when the world is being attacked by aliens, you'd rather work with the Legends of Tomorrow instead of the Dark Knight? Or how about even calling Nightwing, Robin, Red Hood, Batgirl or anyone else from Gotham City? Man, no wonder these Arrowverse heroes are always in a pickle. If there were no plans to introduce the Caped Crusader into this universe, why make mention of him in the first place? Yeah, it's decent fan service, but it also makes us scratch our heads and wonder why he hasn't been called upon in some way before. Think about it: if you could choose between Batman and the Atom, there would be no contest. The Legends Of Tomorrow Are Worse Than The Wonder Twins If you ever watched The All-New Super Friends Hour, you're well aware of how it was an animated team-up series starring Batman, Robin, Wonder Woman, Aquaman…and the Wonder Twins along with their space monkey, Gleek. Despite having 'Wonder' in their name, these two heroes were complete blunders and a constant reminder of the prevalent abuse of LSD in the entertainment history throughout the '70s. Fortunately for them, their throne of suckage is being challenged by the Legends of Tomorrow, a team of heroes less exciting and thrilling than a game of Shaq Fu. Operating as an obvious subpar TV version of the Justice League, this ragtag group is shockingly mediocre to say the least. When you consider how Marvel TV has The Defenders to call upon, this show - featuring the scraps from DC Comics - looks even more embarrassing in comparison. As the series with the least interest (and budget), it trots along with awful CGI and even worse acting. We'll admit that it's so laughingly bad that it's good at times. And hey, at least Brandon Routh has another acting gig after the disappointment of Superman Returns, so good for him. The Fight Scenes There was a time when Arrow's fight scenes were amongst the best on TV. Now, even Finn Jones' lame-fu fighting style on Iron Fist looks better than the garbage that DC TV's shows roll out on a weekly basis. Yes, it's that bad. Looking more like choreographed scenes out of Step Up than action sequences, you can't help but fast-forward through the nonsense because it's painful to watch. As a prime example, did you ever for one minute believe that Katie Cassidy's Black Canary would ever be capable of beating up a criminal? Her moves were so telegraphed that her opponent had already written her a note back saying thanks for the heads-up. Sure, not every actor will have the necessary skill to pull off the physical demands of such shows, but at least they could appear like they're trying. There are some genuine moments when it feels like we're in stuck in a giant trolling experiment and someone is saying, "Suckers. I can't believe they're still watching this after all this crap." Tell us, what annoys you about the Arrowverse? Let us know in the comments section!