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TikTok doctor voicemail
Screengrabs via @sweeetype / TikTok

‘This is absolutely unhinged I’m dying’: Woman discovers her doctor has left her an accidental voicemail, and it needs to be heard to be believed

"I need her memoir."

One of the most prominent influencers of human behavior is the knowledge of whether or not we’re being observed by somebody. Indeed, the things we allow ourselves to say and do when we’re not beholden to the perception of another is very different from the front we put on in the wider social and professional world.

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And so when that front comes down, the proverbial peek behind the curtain is one of the more fascinating things you can come across in life. Such is an apt descriptor of this accidental voicemail from the (former) doctor of TikTok‘s @sweeetype.

@sweeetype

My Dr left me a voicemail.. had a whole 30 min appt with her before i realized 💀 #fypage #fyp #voicemail

♬ original sound – sweeetype

It’s just 42 seconds long, but Carol the doctor wastes no time in getting off to the races as soon as she thought she had hung up. Observe the first words out of her mouth when she thought @sweeetype wasn’t listening: “Dumbass people won’t answer their phone unless it’s right on the f***ing dot. ‘That can’t be her. She’s not supposed to call until one more minute.'”

Not a great look so far, and it’s probably no coincidence that Carol wound up retiring shortly after @sweeetype discovered this little gift of a recording (as confirmed by her in the comments section). One other commenter swooped in with the bright idea of using this recording as blackmail for Ozempic samples (which, of course, is not actually bright so long as functioning organs are important to you).

But Carol wasn’t done yet, quickly shifting gears to the topic of pork tenderloin and chicken, for some reason: “Well, I’ll tell you about a pork tenderloin; it’s just as boring to me as chicken breast. Has no flavor, no inherent flavor. But, if you decide we’re having pork, then you should decide what’s going with it, in my opinion. But supper hasn’t been anything to look forward to in weeks, honestly. Choke it down, okay, we’ve eaten, yay; way I feel about food and life.”

To recap: People don’t answer their phones, meat is boring and also your responsibility, and life is no different than pork because we choke it down all the same. This is the sort of insight you can only acquire in medical school, surely.

It’s infinitely curious that Carol is pessimistically quantifying meat based solely on its taste, though. One would think she’d consider the nutrition profile of both meats if it’s all the same to her anyway. According to Foodstruct, pork boasts more vitamins and minerals than chicken, even though the latter offers more vitamin A, K, B3, and B5, and also more iron. Moreover, because pork is a red meat rather than a white meat like chicken, it’s more likely to increase the risk of diabetes, heart disease, and cancer.

However, we may have an explanation for this as well. In the comments section, @sweeetype reveals that Carol was her medical marijuana doctor, so who’s to say that these sudden musings on the failings of chicken and pork tenderloin didn’t come at the behest of Carol sneaking some of her own product, in a manner of speaking? Perhaps we’ll never know, and we presume Carol would like to keep it that way regardless.

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Author
Image of Charlotte Simmons
Charlotte Simmons
Charlotte is a freelance writer for We Got This Covered, a graduate of St. Thomas University's English program, a fountain of film opinions, and probably the single biggest fan of Peter Jackson's 'King Kong.' She has written professionally since 2018, and will tackle an idiosyncratic TikTok story with just as much gumption as she does a film review.