Marjorie Taylor Greene is not having a good week, which means that the rest of us are. Fresh off finding out that she has precisely zero chance of becoming Donald Trump’s VP — everyone, pretend to be shocked — MTG is now finding her most embarrassing moment in recent times has come back to humiliate her further. No, not the time she revealed she had no idea to say the word “indictable,” although I guess I just did bring that back so now it has.
Just in case you missed it the first time around, the moment when Marjorie found herself getting destroyed by a Democrat is going viral once more. On Jan. 30, the House voted on whether to bring two articles of impeachment against Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas. Presumably because this week saw another vote on Mayorkas held, which on this occasion passed, Taylor Greene’s confusing contribution to the hearing is being enjoyed all over again.
The viral video depicts Taylor Greene being as eloquent as ever, as she spewed out a statement that’s about three-quarters of the way to making some semblance of coherent sense. “Let’s talk about border patrol apprehensions between ports of entry at the Southwest border of terrorists,” was the line she mangled, despite having the words literally written out in front of her, sounding eerily like ChatGPT during its existential meltdown in the process. Isn’t it wonderful when bad things happen to bad sentences?
Democratic Rep. Seth Magaziner wasted no time in capitalizing on the moment to put Taylor Greene to task. Neatly skipping over her garbled diction, proving he’s a better man than me, Magaziner responded:
“I have to say, it is pretty rich hearing the gentlewoman from Georgia express her concern about terrorism when she literally was selling defund the FBI T-shirts and hats on her website for $30 apiece. $30 for the shirts and another $30 for the hats – you don’t get both for just the $30 – the leading law enforcement agency tasked with combating terrorism in this country and keeping people safe, and she wants to defund it,” he explained before concluding, “So I am not going to take any lectures from her on securing this homeland from terror.”
Yes, Magaziner knows what he’s talking about, and here’s the receipts. These fetching garments can be yours for the steal of a price of $30 each! For the full Marjorie Taylor Greene experience, why not wear them while you come after Curb Your Enthusiasm, discuss your expertise on men’s bathrooms, and generally prove that you have a startling lack of empathy for the rest of humanity. Available while stocks last (and, trust me, they will)!
As we barrel ever closer to the fateful events of this November’s election, whatever they may be, let’s take some solace from the fact that MTG just got burned as badly as Anakin Skywalker on the volcanic planet of Mustafar. We should’ve seen that coming, really, because Marjorie Taylor Greene has never, and never will have, the high ground.
Let’s just hope that we won’t soon be saying that her own orange-r answer to Emperor Palpatine has somehow returned (to office).
Published: Feb 22, 2024 08:20 am