Great cinema is driven by great ambition. Without ambition, movies wouldn't exist. Because every project that finds its way into the production stages - even those that don't turn out right in the end or fail to succeed at the box office - is loaded with ambition: somebody has to pursue the dream that one day this thing will get into a theatre and people will watch it. Almost every picture will have that person somewhere in its midst. It must, otherwise what's the point?
Although a Pinocchio-based film seems like the perfect gift that Tim Burton might bestow upon his go-to quirkmeister Johnny Depp ("Can I play Pinocchio, Tim? Can I?"), he's apparently moving away from his boyfriend for chance to work with another actor: Robert Downey Jr.. Well, not that Downey Jr. would play Pinocchio, of course, because that would make for some uncomfortable viewing: he's in line to star as Geppetto, Pinocchio's father. This Burton project has been rumored for a while, but it's just been reported that Jane Goldman (Kiss Ass) has signed on to write the thing.
You may know Aaron Sorkin as "that guy who wrote The West Wing", or perhaps even as "that guy who wrote several versions of the same show after he wrote The West Wing". However you know him - and we prefer to do so through his actually remarkable movie The Social Network - Sorkin is one of Hollywood's hottest writers, and he's currently working away on his next technology-based sort-of biopic. He's did Facebook back in 2010 when that was still cool and running our lives, and he's doing Steve Jobs while Apple are still (burning a hole) in all of our pockets.
Even though the people who made the floppiest movies of the year have probably had a hard enough time as it is, what with all that money they lost and the negative comments they've received from random passerbys who had nasty things to say and sharp objects to throw, Forbes' list of the biggest flops of the year has emerged to make them feel that little bit worse. There aren't too many surprises to be had, although we were sure that The Oogieloves In The Big Balloon Adventure was going to do so much better. Oh, well, audiences these days. You c
Not that he's been asked or anything, but just so you know, Tom Hiddleston would consider a part in the upcoming Star Wars: Episode VII if he happened to be approached . Of course, a revelation of such importance begs follow-up questions with so many more "would you considering doing it?" based questions: Would Tom Hiddleston consider a role in a Star Trek movie? How about a future Indiana Jones installment? Would Tom Hiddleston consider going back in time to kill George Lucas if he came into contact with a doorway that led to 1976? Would Tom Hiddleston consider kissing an alien if it was clean enough? etc.
In no way considering how we talentless degenerates might get our fix of intricately-layered pop culture conversations paired with moments of comical ultra-violence, Quentin Tarantino mentioned recently that his tenth movie might end up being his last. His seventh feature film, Django Unchained, is on its way, but Tarantino is keen to highlight the fact that he doesn't want to end up with like one of those old bastards still clinging to their glory day. I've paraphrased that slightly: here's what Tarantino said:
Because everybody who is talented in one avenue always annoyingly turns out to be talented in various other avenues too, Josh Gad - who originated the role of Elder Cunningham in Trey Parker and Matt Stone's hilarious The Book of Mormon on Broadway (as an actor) - is going to write the sequel to the 80s comedy classic Twins: Triplets.
So, anyway, there's a movie coming out next year called Cuban Fury about a former salsa dance champion who attempts a comeback career. No biggie. Well, except for the fact that it just so happens to hold a dreamy cast of delicious and talent actors like Nick Frost, Rashida Jones, Ian McShane & Chris O'Dowd. Presumably each one of these people will be deloying their regular schtick: Frost doing his loveable oaf; Jones playing the cool female; O'Dowd either acting really nice or really nasty; McShane calling everyone a "cocksucker".
If you haven't heard of Gravity, you're not to blame. The film, directed by Children of Men genius Alfonso Cuaron, started filming all the way back in May 2011, and its scheduled release date has been changing on a day to day basis. But now the sci-fi flick, which stars George Clooney and Sandra Bullock as two attractive people in space, has been set for a theatrical release date of October 18th 2013, which perfectly co-incides with National Gravity Day. It actually doesn't, because we made that holiday up - but wouldn't it be good to celebrate the force that, I don't know, keeps us alive?!
So now we apparently live in a world in which you are rewarded for doing things you should automatically be doing anyway. Case in point: Theatre chain Cinemark (bless them for trying to re-humanise humanity) have offered to give customers coupons for popcorn and treats if they can last an entire film without reaching into their pockets and lighting up the theatre with their mobile phones like the inconsiderate douches they are. If you're somebody reacting to this news with a comment like: "Well, yeah, I suppose I could last 2 hours without checking my phone," then you should no longer be allowed to socialise with other people who go outside.
